Weighty Issues of State ;)

by rockhead on Jan 22, 2008 11:07 PM MST

While we all debate the merits or demerits of contracts, their length and expense, who should stay and who should go, a troubling question comes to my mind. Namely, how long is Dinger's contract? Did the Rockies sell their soul to the devil when they signed off on Dinger, or is it just the first and least publicized bad deal they ever made?

Somewhere in an office building in Denver, back in the early 90s, somebody got paid to hatch even the very idea of this preposterous signing, and I'm demanding to know who that person was. They must be held accountable for the years of salary that have been thrown at this dinosaur. He's annoying at the ballpark, and downright embarrassing on camera. Whilst watching last season's playoffs on the tube, I found myself deeply troubled. "The Rockies have finally made it big, and the entire country is looking only at Barney's forgotten cousin" is all I could think about. "Is this any way for a grown-up franchise to act?"

All sarcasm aside, it is my fervent and passionate belief that Dinger must go. Well, maybe not passionate, but still....Dinger has to go. And while I believe this with all my heart, I confess that I am at a complete loss as to what (or who) should replace him. I've racked my middle-aged brain for a good 10 minutes or so about this, and haven't come up with a decent idea. Truthfully, I would love a mascot along the lines of the Philly Phanatic parading around Coors, (without some of the attitude, mind you), but can't think of what (or who) that would be.

Then, of course, it came to me! My fellow Rockies In Arms on the Row will have an idea or 20! So, here's our task friends. We must come up with a replacement for Dinger. Whether that replacement looks cute enough to sell plush toys should not be the only criteria. Said replacement must relate Colorado. Or not. I still don't know what the Phanatic has to do with Philadelphia, but he's an institution. Said replacement must have some amusement value, and I'm not talking about the sarcastic kind. (I can handle that end for everyone.) Said replacement could maybe have something to do with baseball. Or not. In other words, who's got an idea?

Funny what you come across when you Google Dinger.

Eat. Drink. Be Merry. But the above FanPost does not necessarily reflect the attitudes, opinions, or views of Purple Row's staff.

0 recs | Comment 19 comments

Story-email Email Printer Print

Comments

im sure some people do

rox girl do you have the latest MPR (mascot power rankings) or the VORM ( value over replacement mascot) or you could start with a new matrix considering the merchantdise ground covered morall status and all sorts of stuff value with kids under 10 value with adults, is he a clubhouse mascot? just kidding

great idea i have thaught the same thing for awhile

At least the broncos dont totally suck

by roxfan4life on Jan 22, 2008 11:17 PM MST 0 recs

You made my day!

VORM?!?!? Absolutely hysterical.

Dang I wish I'd thought of that!

2007 NL Champions, baby!

by rockhead on Jan 23, 2008 5:44 PM MST up 0 recs

Promote

Sox the Fox from the Springs...the Rockies are all about promoting talent from within the system and all.

Or....Rocky from the Nuggets has lots of free time in the summer...the first 2 sport/team mascot since the San Diego Chicken

Either that or $2 beer nights...then Dinger won't matter. Those ages 12-20 won't be helped with this solution.

2006 TIME magazine "Person of the Year"

by Redhawk on Jan 22, 2008 11:19 PM MST 0 recs

Rocky!

Amazing idea! Everyone loves Rocky, he's awesome. Although I'm not sure if sinking half court behind the back shots works at a baseball diamond...

"I want to live forever or die trying" Yossarian in "Catch-22"

by Dieb on Jan 23, 2008 1:45 AM MST up 0 recs

Too Too (aka 22)

A silver bullet with a winning attitude.

by Two low rocks on Jan 22, 2008 11:43 PM MST 0 recs

This is the key

Look, Dinger definitely sucks. But... the Rox absolutely CANNOT UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES replace him with one of those smarmy Carson Daly "personality" MC types that walk around the stadium and conduct interviews with fans and do the promotions/quizzes/scoreboard races between innings. The Nationals have one (and I know a few other teams do too). His name is Clint. He's the biggest d-bag I've ever seen in a PR-related job. For the love of God, I'll take ten Dingers over one of those guys. If they replace him, for the love of baseball, replace him with another silent person in a costume.

rockies in october.

by LarryB303 on Jan 23, 2008 4:47 AM MST 0 recs

Absolute agreement

No words. Please.

2007 NL Champions, baby!

by rockhead on Jan 23, 2008 5:42 PM MST up 0 recs

YES

Words cannot describe how much I agree with you.

by oo_nrb on Jan 25, 2008 2:16 AM MST up 0 recs

I actually support keeping Dinger

But not that I actually appreciate his mascot prowess, it's mostly because almost everybody over the age of six seems to pick on him. Especially opposing fans. I tend to root for underdogs, I guess. What I'm really hoping for is that Clint Hurdle -and Dan O'Dowd- somehow transfer their fondness of useless veterans who can't hit and are an embarrassment to the franchise over to Dinger instead, and are therefore less tempted to sign/play such players. How I envision this working is something like this:

O'Dowd: "Gee, I think we could really use a veteran presence in the outfield, can somebody get me Steve Finley's agent's phone number? Wait though.., we've got that purple dinosaur.., we don't need Finley. Never mind!"

Hurdle: "Hmm... my gut's telling me that today's Mark Redman's... Ha-ha! Look at that! Dinger's putting that kid's hat on his horn! That's so funny.., what was I saying? Oh yeah, Morales..."

Yeah, maybe that's too much to hope for.

by Rox Girl on Jan 23, 2008 6:11 AM MST 0 recs

Am I the only one who

actually likes an anthropomorphic dinosaur? I guess I don't see that many games on tv or any in person, so I'm not sure how annoying he is. But Dinosaur Mascot, that's way cool. After all, Colorado Rockies > Dinosaurs > *. Perhaps Dinger just needs to sober up and stop being everyone's most despised drunken uncle who embarrasses you at all sort of important occasions.

by Kindred on Jan 23, 2008 5:09 PM MST 0 recs

Apt analogy

With the drunken uncle. For me, Dinger is just too hopelessly Disneyland. Or "Land Before Time"ish.

Maybe a redesign is the answer, as I understand the dinosaur connection. Something along the lines of "Jurassic Park". Nah. Never sell that one.

2007 NL Champions, baby!

by rockhead on Jan 23, 2008 9:39 PM MST up 0 recs

A redesign is the answer...

I'm not opposed to having a dinosaur as the mascot, but for the love of god he doesn't have to look like baby-bop's retarted brother.

Somebody mentioned this up above, but the best idea would be to promote Sox the Fox from the Springs. Everyone loves Sox the Fox.

It's amazing how much free time I have during the off-season.

by jcd823 on Jan 24, 2008 7:30 PM MST up 0 recs

I partly agree

Dinger needs a bit of a redesign; he's quite popular with the kids, but I think that by changing a few colors around he could be very appealing to adults too.

But keep Sox in the Springs! Being a Springs resident myself, I feel that he's a valuable piece of Colorado Springs baseball...or something like that. That, and a fox doesn't really represent the Rockies... A friend of mine suggested that a rock running around the park would work...though it seems kind of awkward to me :) .

by oo_nrb on Jan 25, 2008 2:16 AM MST up 0 recs

No rock!

That's just one step away from being that stupid Stanford Tree. I'll take a million Dingers over that dumb Christmas tree thing.

That being said, I generally have no problem with Dinger, though my level of exposure is probably much less, not being able to get to many games or catch them on tv (and the ones I do catch are usually road games in SF, anyway). But a redesign would probably make him a little more acceptable. Tone down the colors, make him a little less cartoonish, and you'd probably have something that would work.

by holly96 on Jan 25, 2008 11:26 AM MST up 0 recs

Mhmm

I've always liked that our mascot has a story behind it, and a redesign would be a lot better choice than just scrapping him.

by oo_nrb on Jan 26, 2008 8:44 PM MST up 0 recs

Dinger once gave me candy...

At the last game of the season a couple of years back when we were losing to the Giants and Kim was pitching. He stole a whole carton of cotton candy from the vendor and ran around our section throwing it up in the air. My kids and I caught one and we've been a fan of his ever since!!

There's only one Rocktober!!

by Charlie77 on Jan 28, 2008 11:40 PM MST up 0 recs

I saw dinger give a kid a bloody nose.

Dinger was playing with the kid and accidentally hit the kid. Blood started going everywhere. Dinger then runs like hell to the bullpen, steals someone's hat and then returns and gives it to the kid. I think he almost got hit by some one taking batting practice.

by Blake20th on Jan 30, 2008 8:56 AM MST up 0 recs

Sox the Fox!

I fully support promotg Sox the Fox from the springs. I understand that he wouldn't make any sense as the rockies mascot but he actually does a pretty good job down there. He has put in his time in the system and deserves the chance. BTW the sky sox have the most ridiculous MC personality roaming around security service field. This nerdy middle aged makes a fool of himself all game long, anybody who has made the trip down there knows what I'm talking about!

by andyb7290 on Jan 27, 2008 4:40 PM MST 0 recs