Things I Want to See This Season

Or, Crazy Optimistic Predictions I Wrote While Wearing My Purple Glasses

A new season is nearly upon us, so I thought I’d share some things I would like to happen, or at least would be fun if they did happen.  I have an extra pitcher of purple kool-aid and plenty of cases of Rockahol, if you want to join me…


Opening Day will be crazy. A record crowd will see an amazing pitching performance by Ubaldo featuring something that shall not be mentioned, and/or a walk-off win.

Not so crazy: Spilly’s at-bat song will be revealed, and will be better than Tulo’s. Tulo’s song is not stupid. I can dream, can’t I?

A Rockies player hits for the cycle against the Cubs (again) in April.

 All the players that were injured in Spring Training miraculously heal. There are no more injuries after that.

 There will be a benches clearing brawl between Rockies and Giants. It gets ugly, and hair-pulling is reported.

The Wave is not successfully done at Coors in 2011. There are less blown saves as a result. The bullpen reports absolute confidence and focus.

 The Rockies sweep the Mets. The Rockies sweep the Yankees. Hmm, when was the last time that happened in the same year? Yeah. Hmm.

Iannetta’s hair gives him unexplainable hitting statistics. Shock abounds. The Rockies organization declares that all their previously struggling players grow their hair out.  Ian Stewart gets a discount on Hair-Be-There from Ubaldo, and his hair grows back. He hits better. Seth Smith decides to grow out his beard instead. It works also.

 Cargo and Tulo hit back to back home runs 10 times. Tulo tell Cargo to just get on base, for goodness’ sake. It will have the same effect, anyways.

 Cargo, Tulo, and Ubaldo start in the All-Star game, and at least one more Rockies players are chosen as reserves.  One of them will be the MVP and give the Rockies home-field advantage in the World Series.

 The Rockies go on a streak after the All Star break. A good one. Like the kind where they win 11 in a row.

 A Rockies pitcher hits a home run. Finally.

The Rockies have less one-run losses. They also have less insane comebacks, and decide to blow everyone out by 10 or more runs instead. Healthier heart rates are reported amongst Rockies (Nation? Road? Kingdom?) Fanbase.

In September, Tulo will pass Babe Ruth again for home runs in September- and himself.

 Ubaldo will get 25 wins.

 All of our players are MVP candidates. All of our pitchers are Cy Young candidates. Rockies players win both.

 Huston will not blow a save, and will get a lot of them including the most important one to win the World Series.

The Rockies clinch the NL West in early September. After that, though unnecessary, they go on a huge winning streak that lasts until October.

The Rockies meet the Phillies again in the first round. The pattern goes like this: the Rockies and Phillies have met in the first round every other year since ’07. Every time they do that, the winner goes on to the World Series. 2007: Rockies. 2009: Phillies. The next sequence in this pattern? (Answer: Rockies)

The Rockies win the World Series in four games.

I said it last year, and I’ll say it again. This is R year.

But I really mean it this time.

I want to win the World Series so badly this year, even more so than last year. It’s like I can almost reach it.  I can’t say I can taste it, ‘cause I don’t really know what it tastes like. I can imagine, though.  

When the Rockies first went to the World Series, I was a dorky and geeky kid with braces, barely into my freshman year in high school. Sheesh, I thought by now we’d have won the World Series.  I never got to put "Rockies Are World Champions" under the world events page in the yearbook, only "Red Sox slaughter Colorado Rockies in World Series(It was a sad day in Denver indeed)", "Rockies trade Matt Holliday", and "Rockies lock up Tulo and Cargo" were immortalized into the history of my high school days.  This fall, I’ll be a geeky (maybe less dorky) kid with glasses starting my freshman year in college. Maybe another freshman year means another trip to the World Series.  College days are supposed to be the best years of your life, or so say those who don’t think that high school days are supposed to be. Hopefully the next four years holds a championship. Or at least better than a Pennant and a Wild Card.

Yeah, I don’t really think all of the "predictions" mentioned in the above list will happen. I just hope the last one will. Sure, I’m scared it won’t. I lay awake at night sometimes scared that 2011 will be a sequel of 2010 (This time, ladies and gentlemen, with even more disappointments!).  I can make a list of things that can and will go wrong, but won’t. It’s baseball. Crazy things are gonna happen- good and bad crazy things. Being scared and doubtful doesn’t help, so I put myself to sleep reassuring my doubtful side that all those good things don’t have to happen, just the last one, and they don’t have to happen in order to get to the last one. So…

The Rockies win the World Series in four games however many games it takes.

To quote a song lyric: You may say that I'm a dreamer…but I'm not the only one. Quoting a different song: You can call me a dreamer, but these dreams will come true. And yes I am a firm believeR in the things that we can do.

Whatever. It’s gonna be a fun season.

 Don’t worry, be happy.

Hakuna Matata.


Eat. Drink. Be Merry. But the above FanPost does not necessarily reflect the attitudes, opinions, or views of Purple Row's staff (unless, of course, it's written by the staff [and even then, it still might not]).

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