from the Denver Post
Mr M.: "Bud, can I talk to you?"
Mr. S.: "Sure Charley, always glad to talk with my fellow -er I mean, well you know owners I used to be fellow with, wink-wink."
M.: "Well, no, I don't think I understand what you mean, but really what I'm here to talk to you about is..."
S.: "Say, Charley old-boy, I hate to interrupt, but have you seen this picture yet? It's me last weekend on Larry's yacht, catching a Marlin. Pretty impressive, eh? Lar and I were thinking of sticking a big hook through the head and sending it to Loria with a note attached saying: 'You!'
"Pretty funny, huh? Wouldn't that be a holler? It was Larry's idea, you wouldn't have any big hooks, would you, I've got to do this before I forget..."
M.: "Uhm, no, Bud, actually it's about Larry that I wanted to talk to you. You see..."
S.: "Say, no more, Charley, I think I know where this is going, and you're in luck, I can get you tickets right behind the dugout."
S.: "For the World Series in Boston again this year, isn't that what you're after?"
M.: "Er, no, wait, how do you know the Red Sox will even be in the World Series?"
S.: "Oh did I say, that? Of course I don't know, if you get what I mean, just like I didn't know last year, wink-wink,"
M.: "Why do you keep saying that? What do you mean wink-wink? Are you fixing things?"
S.: "Fixing you up with a pair of primo World Series tickets, is what I'm fixing! so what do you say, visitors or home side?"
M.: "Isn't George going to get suspicious?"
S.: "What, Steinbrenner? Please, Georgie Porgie's my lapdog now! Who's your Pappi, Georgie, who's your Pappi? Bud's your Pappi. Ha!
See, Charley, I got me some new friends ...Well, wait a second, I guess I should check with Larry to see if he says it's alright I call him that. I'll call really fast, it won't take a minute... Hi Debbie? Debbie it's Bud, is Larry in? Can I talk to him? Bud Selig, the commissioner.., S-E-L-I-G... uhm, okay, yes I'll hold, he'll answer this time, right?"
Now while I'm waiting, did you say home? Or visitors?"
M.: "Uh, you better make that home, behind the owner's box, if it's possible, with a clear sight line and plenty of room to demonstrate pitching techniques to my boy..."
S.: "Sure, Charley, and was there anything else you wanted to talk to me about?"
M.: "Nope, that would be it, thanks Bud, thanks a lot..,"
S.: "Not a problem... uhp, Debbie? Yes, I'm still here.., sure I'll hold some more, no rush..."