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Game #24: Rockies vs Braves; Hirsh vs Smoltz

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After much research and careful internet search diagnostics, I have come to the conclusion that the Rockies as a team suffer from Dysphoric Social Attention Consumption Deficit Anxiety Disorder, or DSACDAD, as it's called for short.

Scientists believe the condition DSACDAD typically develops when the brain's reward system becomes compromised, leaving sufferers feeling less than best. HAVIDOL works by binding to receptors of the recently discovered hedonine hormone. What this means for the sufferer is a greatly improved sense of well-being and the ability to enjoy the challenges of our high-paced culture.

While there is a treatment for DSACDAD, it might take time for the Rockies to see the benefit. I suggest they consult with their physician right away. In the meantime, let's hope they can win tonight regardless.