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Snakes with clubs still not a fair fight, toothless Rockies get whacked 12-3.

What? You're expecting analysis here, or something? The Rockies look to be mailing in the season after losing Carlos Gonzalez, so why worry too much? I'm just sitting around sipping a mojito while refreshing and Troy Renck's Twitter feed just looking for a rumor of life or something.

Yeah, some Diamondbacks hit some HR's with like a dozen people on board, I think that punk Justin Upton got one of them, and Jason Hammel looked pretty awful. Mark Kiszla would say to fire Dan O'Dowd. Woody Paige would say to trade scrubs on the farm for Felix Hernandez. Every reporter and every reporter's mother would say to dump one of the three Rockies to get an extra base hit tonight (hint: not Todd Helton, not Troy Tulowitzki.) I go the Gertrude Stein route and say that there's not much there, here. There. There's your keen analysis, here's the record:

48 - 53


Lost 1






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