/cdn.vox-cdn.com/uploads/chorus_image/image/182509/152659733.jpg)
Let's get the easy/lazy stuff out of the way right off the bat:
LOL PAYROLL
LOL CONTRACTS
LOL CARL CRAWFORD
LOL NED COLLETTI
Ok, now that we're past that, let's break this down:
The Dodgers sit 3 games behind the Cardinals in the race for the 2nd NL Wild Card slot. This means that any combination of 4 Cardinals wins or 4 Dodgers losses will mean that the Dodgers will be golfing this October rather than playing any sort of meaningful baseball.
The Rockies' mission, should they choose to accept it, is this:
Be the NL Playoff Grinches for the Dodgers. There needs to be no joy in Los Angeles, for mighty Matt Kemp will have just struck out. Dakota Fanning will walk up to Wilin Rosario and say "Why? Why, Wilin Rosario, why are you taking our playoff hopes?" and Rosario will just give her a blank, confused look while eating a gigantic hoagie, and then Tyler Chatwood will ask her out, and it will be this big awkward thing. Because that's what happens in LA.
Dakota Fanning is 18. I don't think Tyler Chatwood is a creeper.
Thing is, despite Adrian Gonzalez and Juan Rivera killing the ball over the past 2 weeks, the Dodgers are merely 5-5 in their past 10 games. The Cardinals are 8-2 over the same stretch. Doesn't seem to me like the Dodgers WANT it as much as the Cardinals. They ain't HUNGRY enough.
To be fair, Dodgers' pitching has been killing it over that arbitrary 14-day period. Who told Josh Beckett, Aaron Harang, and Joe Blanton that they were allowed to pitch competently? Who cast some weird Harry Potter spell to fix Clayton Kershaw in time for him to make 2 starts before the season's end? And who the hell is Stephen Fife?
This is the best way for the Rockies to finish 2012, in my mind, is to wreck what's left of it for the Dodgers. Now, the Dodgers are certainly not the Cubs, but the Rockies played some pretty decent baseball these past 3 days. You see, I want the Dodgers to lose. I don't know why I so vehemently want this all of a sudden, but Lord, do I. Maybe just to pretend that the Rockies had some sort of impact on 2012. Maybe to show this toddler of a baseball team actually has sprouted some teeth and isn't afraid to bite. Maybe so I can call my grandmother in 3 days and make sure she knows that the Rockies ruined their season.
The important thing is to not let this sweeping momentum hit the wall and stop. Leave your fans with a good taste in their mouths, Rockies.
Expected Pitching Matchups:
Friday, September 28, 8:10PM MT
Jeff Francis vs Clayton Kershaw
Saturday, September 29, 7:10PM MT
Tyler Chatwood vs Joe Blanton
Sunday, September 30, 2:10PM MT
Jorge De La Rosa vs Stephen Fife