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Game Preview: Is there anybody out there?

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Wade Miley versus Christian Bergman in a battle to see which team will get the higher draft pick. Or sweep the series or win the game ... or something.

Doug Pensinger

The Colorado Rockies are bad. The Arizona Diamondbacks are bad. The terrible, horrible, no good, very bad 2014 baseball season is nearing its merciful end.

Professional football is on television today. Is anyone watching this game?

If you are reading this, you probably are watching this game and for that (and I guess for myself) I can only say a prayer for our souls

Christian Bergman takes the mound for the boys in purple, hoping to complete a meaningless sweep that is killing our chances at a top two overall draft pick. I mean, yay for winning!

Wade Miley will be on the bump for the Snakes who really know how to tank and are messing up our draft. Jerks.

You know who won't be playing in this game? Kyle Parker. You know why? Me either.

Interesting note, I suppose, is that Michael Cuddyer will be playing at first base because apparently the Rockies see more promise in the future of a 36 year old with injury problems and no legs than their first round draft pick who desperately needs at-bats against MLB level pitching. Sigh.

Oh well, whatever. Go team, I guess. Go Rafael Ynoa ... yeah.