Whenever I drive across the country, I always make note of specific places where the wind turbines rise up from the horizon and cover the landscape with weird, long shadows. In a matter of seconds you go from a highway traversing nothing -- I love miles and miles of open road -- to a bizarre maze running through massive, slow-turning wind farms that reach the sky and seem to keep going for miles without ceasing. Frankly, they are kind of creepy.
You know some of the places I'm talking about, too. There are a few I can think of off the top of my head: pretty much the entire middle section of Kansas as you ride down Interstate 70, for one. Kansas is fairly flat (in case you hadn't heard), so I suppose it's just good business to harness that energy.
The other place is east of San Bernardino and Riverside, on Interstate 10 in southern California heading towards Palm Springs, and then beyond it for those driving east to Phoenix. A desert covered in nothing but wind turbines baking in the sun, occasionally turning a bit here and there. They're creepy, man! Wind turbines are creepy, and I'm sorry, but that's just an objective fact. They're all... tall. And they just stand there all quiet and... creepy.
Anyways, I'm writing about wind turbines because (a) I'm attempting to delay for as long as possible having to write about Drew Stubbs' pathetic 2015, and (b) Stubbs was a wind turbine this summer with as often as he whiffed. No, seriously. Here's a map of wind farms in the United States; I'm 87% certain you'll find Stubbs on that map.*
Seriously. Take a look at these small wind turbines that produce less than 100 kilowatts and are meant to power single homes and stuff. Stubbs absolutely produced enough wind power with his strikeouts to reach 100 kW. It's great to know he is promoting alternative energies that will one day make America great again!
Coming in to 2015, every halfway intelligent person around the Rockies knew that Drew Stubbs was primed for a pretty massive regression from his uncharacteristically strong 2014. And some kind of regression would have been handled well enough; considering he hit .289/.339/.482 with 22 doubles, 15 homers, and 20 stolen bases in 424 plate appearances in '14, regressing back to his career averages or somewhere close would have been expected.
And yet it ended up being so much worse than that for him this year. It started in Spring Training, when Stubbs struck out nearly half the time he came to the plate, and then continued over the summer, when Stubbs, uhh, struck out nearly half the time he came to the plate.
That dog didn't hunt. My colleague Jordan Freemyer perhaps put it best, saying Stubbs "struck out like it was a bodily function."
Despite a decent power showing by the outfielder (in 114 plate appearances he managed to slug .431 with three doubles, two triples, and five home runs even while striking out 50 times), the Rockies designated him for assignment in August and cut ties with him for good a few days later.
He wound up with the Rangers, and while he was really bad (he went just 2-for-21 with 10 strikeouts), he did get an at-bat in the American League Division Series.
He struck out.
*please take pity on me and my poor, awful jokes