There's no question Coors Field is an enigma in Major League Baseball. As if we needed any more proof that it's a tough place for pitchers, recently retired Major Leaguer Dan Haren jumped into the fray on Twitter Monday morning to share some thoughts about the thin air in Denver's ballpark.
Amid a long stream of funny, self-aware memories of his baseball career, Haren dropped in this gem of a tweet:
I would count out the days about a month in advance to see if I was gonna pitch in Coors field.— dan haren (@ithrow88) January 4, 2016
But wait, there's more!
Haren's tweet today got us interested in his feed — he's a good and funny tweeter even when not talking about Coors Field — and it led right to this incredible exchange from two weeks ago, that started with Haren referencing Donald Trump's use of "schlonged" on the campaign trail:
We use it in baseball too....Every time I pitched in Coors Field I got schlonged. https://t.co/ZU1TNFe0PL— dan haren (@ithrow88) December 23, 2015
From there, Dodgers' catcher A.J. Ellis picked things right up by calling Haren out for getting "Dickerson'd":
.@ithrow88 when you used "schlonged" in a sentence are you using it for it's synonym "Dickerson'd"?— AJ Ellis (@AJEllis17) December 23, 2015
Yes, that's a reference to the Colorado Rockies' outfielder Corey Dickerson, and yes, Haren 'fessed up to his struggles against the powerful left-handed hitter:
@AJEllis17 yes, maybe I should've schlonged you for making me throw all those cutters to him— dan haren (@ithrow88) December 23, 2015
How bad was it, you ask? Well, Haren's now-retired memory hasn't betrayed him; in seven career at-bats, Dickerson hit two home runs and three doubles off the right-handed pitcher, slashing .714/.714/2.000... a true schlonging, as it were.
Haren is right to still feel the after effects of pitching at Coors Field even during retirement, too. In 11 career starts at the Rockies' home ballpark, the righty went 5-5 with a 5.56 ERA and a 1.324 WHIP in 68 innings pitched, allowing 82 hits and a whopping 19 (!!) home runs in the thin Denver air.
Good on Haren for having some fun with Coors Field on his Twitter feed this morning, though; he's one of the game's good guys and deserves the very best in retirement after a long and successful — at least away from Coors Field — career in Major League Baseball.