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In which we give thanks for the existence of Nolan Arenado

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Rockies news and links for Wednesday, November 27, 2019

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By now you may have figured out that I’m a cynical joy-hater who dislikes following rules or doing anything people tell me to do. So naturally, I find the mandatory giving of thanks to be boring and uninspired.

But tomorrow is Thanksgiving, so I thought it might be “fun” if we all took a few minutes to reflect on some of the things I’m thankful for.

1. The existence of Nolan Arenado

Nolan Arenado 2019 Highlights | MLB on YouTube

Admittedly, this is not an article, as you may have surmised from the whole “YouTube” thing. Instead, it’s over six minutes of Nolan being Nolan.

You’re welcome.

2. Trevor Story is a good guy at sports.

The Rockies have prioritized a long-term deal for Trevor Story — and there’s a reason why | The Athletic ($)

The reason is that he is very good.

The Rockies also don’t exactly have a backup. I mean, they have Brendan Rodgers and Garrett Hampson — both are former shortstops, but neither of them comes anywhere close to Story in terms of arm strength or range. And that’s just on the defensive side of the ball.

So basically, the Rockies aren’t trading Trevor Story.

Stop asking.

3. Jon Gray is not going away.

Trading Gray not in Rockies’ plans | MLB.com

Hey, guess what.

You also can’t have Jon Gray.

The NL West’s most attractive trade chips | MLB.com

But just for fun, here’s another article suggesting the Rockies should trade Jon Gray or German Marquez.

4. Ladies can do stuff now.

A Conversation With Trevor Bauer’s New Agent, Rachel Luba | Beyond the Box Score

The Cubs hired Rachel Folden as a minor league hitting coach. The Yankees hired Rachel Balkovec as a minor league hitting coach. Trevor Bauer hired Rachel Luba as his agent.

Yes, it’s a great time to be a woman named Rachel in baseball.

Sure, we have to deal with articles that offer brilliant investigative journalism like “This pretty young lady is Rachel Luba; we found the blue-eyed stunner on several photos posted on Trevor Bauer’s Instagram account, so we wonder is Ms. Luba Bauer’s girlfriend?” (She’s not. She’s his agent.)

And sure, sometimes the headlines are things like “Yankees Hire a Woman as a Minor League Hitting Coach.” (To be fair, this has been updated to “The Yankees Hired a Hitting Coach. Her Name Is Rachel,” which I guess is better.)

But nonetheless, I think we can agree that if Tyler Bauer can hire a ladyperson to do professional baseball things, anyone can.

5. Alexis and Snuckles are safe.

Report: MLB Investigating pitcher Sam Dyson for domestic violence after social media posts | Yahoo Sports

Here’s a fun idea I just thought of: What if, instead of professional athletes abusing their significant others, they didn’t?

★ ★ ★

In closing, let’s all give thanks for our food, for our friends, for our families and for Upham Woods.

And, most importantly, for Nolan Arenado.